Auscultate, O Heart

I found this tag at Sayesha's, and since it looked like fun and I have not blogged in the last three months, this is your lucky day.

These are the rules:
1. Put your music player on Shuffle mode.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Write the song name no matter what it is.
4. After you've answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and let them know they've been tagged.

Before I begin, let me tell you that I have weird taste in music (and clothes, too, come to think of it). Queries along the lines of "you actually listen to that crap?" will receive a lesson on the indecencies of the enquirer's ancestors. Consider this a statutory warning. Wow, I used "statutory warning" in a sentence. My, what, language skills, are, like, getting, y'know, better. I mean, like, wow.

1. If someone says "Is this okay?", you say:
Come as you are, as you were
As I want you to be
Hey, that would have been appropriate if my usual response wasn't "What crapped on it?"

2. What would best describe your personality?
She's got you high and you don't even know yet
The sun's in the sky, it's warming up your bare legs
I would love to meet whoever is singing this about me. He (note the masculine pronoun) better be handsome. And rich. And not given to airing his bare legs in public.

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
That is the chorus. I had to use that because I couldn't make any sense out of
Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in.
The girl, well, she means nothing to me, and I don't know why.

4. How do you feel today?
I'm not like them
But I can pretend
The sun is gone
But I have a light
The day is done
But I'm having fun
I think I'm dumb
Or maybe just happy
I feel a little nauseous, to be honest, so happy I am not. I guess I was dumb to eat all that shellfish for dinner.

5. What is your life's purpose?
Young teacher, the subject
Of schoolgirl fantasy
She wants him so badly
Knows what she wants to be
*pointedly stares in the opposite direction*
For those who know me, this is highly inaccurate. I repeat, inaccurate. As in, not true. I cannot emphasise that enough.
For those who are in on my deepest, darkest secrets, isn't this ridiculous?

6. What do your friends think of you?
Si ella te hace falta
Como el agua
Si es tu mayor necesidad
That is the Spanish version of Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman. Jeez, my friends secretly wonder if I am gay? I have said this before, and I am saying it again, the answer is NO. N-O. No. Nicht. Nahi. Non. Nein. A very emphatic no.

7. What do you think of your parents?
Come to decide that the things that I tried
Were in my life just to get high on
Reminds me of this.

8. What do you think about very often?
To really love a woman, to understand her
You gotta know it deep inside.
Holy shit. This is NOT funny.

9. What is 2+2?
Such a feelin's comin' over me
There is wonder in most everything I see
Nah. Let's see the next one.
The wise man said
Just walk this way
To the dawn of the light.
And forget about stupid Math problems.

10. What do you think of your best friend?
Talk to me softly, there is
Something in your eyes
Don't bend your head in sorrow
And please don't cry
Yeah, I won't let her cry tonight. Because she has a bad cold and went to bed early.

11. What do you think of the person you like?
Uske siwa, kuchh yaad nahi [I think of nothing but him]
Uske siwa, koi baat nahi [I talk of nothing else but him]
This would be true if I did have a crush on someone at the moment. I don't.
For those in on my deepest, darkest, secrets, *giggle*

12. What is your life story?
Love of mine
Someday you will die
But I'll be close behind
And follow you into the dark
He is going to die before we meet? And I have nothing to fear because I am going to die too? I knew the world was coming to an end.

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
We passed upon the stairs
Spoke of was and when
I am going to sell the world. The one that is going to end soon. Take that, suckers!

14. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Kyun aaj kal neend kam khwab zyada hai [I wonder why I dream more and sleep less now]
Lagta khuda ka koi nek irada hai [I think the Big Guy has something in store for me]
*giggle*
On a more cynical note, I think the song is more about indigestion.

15. What do your parents think of you?
Take a bow
The night is over
This masquerade is
Getting older
Now my parents want me to leave home. How can they even think such a thing? I have no money, no job, no other place to live. When I sell the world, they go too.

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?
It's good news week
Someone's dropped a bomb somewhere
Contaminating atmosphere
And blackening the sky
It's been wonderful, love, and we are going to live happily ever after, just the two of us. Because everyone else is dead.

17. What will they play at your funeral?
She's got a smile that it seems to me
It reminds me of childhood memories
If only they would stare long enough to break down and cry. It would be better if they all stopped laughing until after I get cremated.

18. What is your hobby/interest?
Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I've heard of
Once in a lullaby
Yes, I am dreaming of a land where there are no exams.

19. What is your biggest secret?
Soy un hombre muy honrado,
Que me gusta lo mejor
Las mujeres no me faltan,
Ni el dinero, ni el amor
Uh-oh. Now everybody knows that I am really Antonio Banderas. That is not good.

20. What do you think of your friends?
Dancing bears, painted wings
Things I almost remember
In a strange way, this is probably about long lost friends from kindergarten.

21. What should you post this as?
Listen with your heart
You will understand
That will teach you to laugh at my misfortunes. This is the solemn cry of my heart, et cetera.
Hence the title.

22. What do you think about this tag?
When the night is still
And the sea is calm
Lonely shadow
You'll fall upon me.
Lay by my side
Fear not tonight
Lonely shadow
You'll find a new light.
WTF? I am guessing that the lyricist was high on crack.

I have skipped all the instrumental ones. Otherwise my biggest secret would have been the Four Seasons. Which is not really something to be ashamed of. It shows I have good taste. HA!

And now, I tag, well, no one. The nausea is getting worse, and I think I'll go find out how my intestines look like floating in the toilet.

UPDATE: Not that anyone reads the blog, but I felt compelled to put this in. The nausea I kept talking about? Was bad. Very bad. And the vomiting that followed was even worse. I nearly died of shellfish poisoning. I am out of the hospital, where they did every conceivable test on me to rule out saxitoxin poisoning, which I had never heard of before. And the bill. Oh, lord, the bill! Anyway, I am fine now, and (almost) completely recovered. So yay.